Paperwork: Tired of aging? There’s a pill for that … coming … maybe

Lonny Cain

“Hey, relax, there’s a pill for that.”

“For what?” you might ask.

“For everything,” is the reply.

Sorry, I’m having this conversation right now running through my medically healthy brain. At least I think it’s healthy. But hey, if it’s not, there’s probably a pill for that.

This feels like a joke, right? Well, I’m seriously wondering if it’s true – that there’s a pill for everything.

In fact, I’ve been wrapping my head around this headline: “A Pill to Slow Aging?”

Wow, I’m thinking. Just in time for Christmas. Even more encouraging was the drop head:

“Researchers have been looking for decades for ways to delay human aging and prevent diseases. The prognosis for success appears to be improving.”

The article was written by Rachel Nania, who covers health care issues for AARP, American Association for Retired Persons.

She notes scientists for decades have been searching for a medical Holy Grail that focuses on the aging process that is directly linked to many diseases that attack as we age.

“Despite the research costs and scientific challenges, the path toward such a pill is attracting more interest than ever,” she reports. ”The federal government is involved, as well as many prominent academic institutions. Billionaire ‘biohackers’ have joined the fray, pursuing their own age-defying theories and sparing no expense.”

The growing sense of urgency, Nania says, is tied to the fact people older than 85 fall into the fastest-growing population in the U.S. She quotes experts including Steven Austad, a biology professor at the University of Alabama at Birmingham and senior scientific director for the American Federation for Aging Research.

“Suddenly we’re confronted with this world that’s going to have more and more people living into their 80s, 90s and 100s in the near future,” he said, adding there have been real breakthroughs but we are only a couple miles down a 10-mile journey.

Nania reports there have been promising results with animals but human testing takes a long time and lots of money. Plus the Food and Drug Administration does not recognize aging as a preventable condition.

“So there’s no clear pathway to approve medications to treat it,” Nania says. “However, experts in the field are hopeful this will change.

“Finding a way to keep these adults healthy in their latter decades not only enhances their quality of life, but experts say it could be a boon for the economy and a break for the health care system, which shells out trillions of dollars each year to treat chronic diseases that become more common with age.”

Nania’s article provides more interesting details and mentions some specific drugs that Austad sees as “top contenders” for slowing the aging process. (Search “aging pill” at https://www.aarp.org.)

Like anything promising in the health field, I tend to applaud the research knowing it likely won’t benefit me but could be promising for my kids or grandkids. But I have seen some amazing medical advancements in my lifetime. In fact, I’d say many of those have a lot to do with why many seniors are enjoying their 80s and older.

We all know that living longer doesn’t necessarily make us happier. And we tend to pursue the happiness Holy Grail about as much as we seek the “Fountain of Youth.”

Life is full of challenges and problems – no matter how old you are. But hey, there are pills for that. It’s likely you can find someone always ready to sell you what you need. (To help, not to cure.)

Meanwhile, we continue to see amazing medical advancements. However, I still find myself mumbling the same advice.

Be careful what you swallow.

Lonny Cain, retired managing editor of The Times in Ottawa, also was a reporter for The Herald-News in Joliet in the 1970s. His PaperWork email is lonnyjcain@gmail.com. Or mail The Times, 110 W. Jefferson St., Ottawa, IL 61350.